REVIEW : ATTACK GIRLS SWIM TEAM VS THE UNDEAD

ATTACK GIRLS’ SWIM TEAM VS THE UNDEAD

Don’t you just hate it when you start a new school, intent on joining the swim team, only to discover that the teachers and students are part of a secret experiment to turn the general populous into flesh hungry creatures from beyond the grave? No? Come to think of it I don’t think that has ever happened to myself either. But that exactly what’s on offer here in Attack Girls’ Swim Team VS The Undead (A.k.a. The Girls Rebel Force Of Competitive Swimmers, A.k.a. Undead Pool).

Our heroine and lead, Aki, has arrived at her new school only to find that the teachers and students have been infected with an inoculation, that is supposed to vaccinate them from a new virus that seems to be making the students drop like flies, but instead turns them into psychotic zombies. If that’s not bad enough, our protagonist finds solace in this horrific situation through her strong urge to join the high school swim team and a fellow classmate who may or may not be her sister, who she sleeps with on the cantina floor during the said takeover. Throw in a teacher with razor sharp rulers, a super assassin back story, an abusive swim team coach, a vibrator glove, a flute that makes school girls take there clothes off and you have an hour or so of mind blowing, what the f**k movie, that the title only begins to gesture toward.

It all sounds like great fun doesn’t it? And for the most part it is. Its not high art. It’s not even low art. It is what it is. A girls swim team fighting the undead. The whole thing starts quite strong and even though the film is shot on video, it almost adds to the wackiness seen on screen. Its only when we get about half in that the whole thing kind of loses it’s way, focusing a lot more on stripping the girls rather than spraying the gore. That’s where the film falls down, although the sex scenes are fun within the context of the movie, they quickly over stay their welcome and it becomes uncomfortable viewing.

The film manages to almost redeem itself with an epic fight scene and couple of twists in the last act that almost bring it back to awesomeville. But it just never quite gets back to where it started.

OVERALL

A movie that has its really highs and its really lows. Like I said, it’s not art, it never pretends to be, its stupidity, but stupidity at its best. Some of the kills are amazing and will have you shouting no belief (I swear that at one point you actually see a mannequin head, like they didn't even bother to cover up the fact that that's what it was). 

Best thing you can do with this is get some beers and a take away and some like-minded friends and watch away. 

Mycho